Category Archives: Happiness

Love Or Fear? The Motivation Equation

Where is the fear? And how can love diffuse it? These are the questions inherent in almost all motivational challenges. By developing a deeper understanding of the fundamental relationship of love and fear and how they function in the human organism, we learn to graciously navigate emotionally charged thought processes and volatile perceptual boundaries, thus inviting profound shifts of perspective in real time.

The Primal Elements

Love and fear are elemental forces we are born with and experience throughout our lifetimes, yet they defy absolute comprehension. Behavioral philosophies and psychological theories of the mind commonly consider love and fear as the primary emotions of the reptilian brain, with all other emotions being secondary. Physiologically, love and fear are tied to our survival instinct and the release of the stress (fear) hormones adrenaline and cortisol, and their anti-stress (love) hormonal counterpart, oxytocin. On a mental, emotional and physical basis, love connects us—within ourselves, to each other, and to the world around us—while fear separates us.

Consequently, love and fear are also the primal factors of motivation. Love is the impetus for connecting to our world so that we develop and thrive, while fear compels separation as a means of protection for ourselves and our loved ones. Comprehending this innate relationship of love and fear as the motivational foundation of human behavior offers a tangible context for resolving conflict and inspiring transformation, both individually and collectively.

In our innovative programs and practices at Cathexis Therapeutic Imagery, we actively enjoin our clients in the mindful process of identifying separating behavior (fearful actions and/or reactions based on perceived threats) and responding with connecting behavior (caring gestures and acts of compassion). This serves as an effective strategy for breaking down complex issues into workable pieces that can be addressed in the moment, and empowers change as individuals, teams and organizations realize how compassion is the potent connective tissue in their internal and external relationships. We call this dynamic cognitive empathy, which is an important component of a larger skill-set known as emotional intelligence.

Excavating Maslow’s Pyramid

Any credible discussion of the psychology of motivation requires consideration of Abraham Maslow and his motivational theory based on human needs. So let’s examine Maslow’s infamous hierarchy of needs, which is archetypically depicted as levels within a pyramid.

Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs Is More About Self-Actualization Than Motivation

Maslow proposed his hierarchy of needs in a paper entitled “A Theory of Human Motivation,” which was published in 1943. The concepts have provided a framework for the psychology of motivation and have been widely utilized to conceptualize policy and practice in the social sciences and in business. The precept is that human behavior is motivated by the satisfaction or frustration of needs, which are arranged in a predominant hierarchy from physiological, to safety, to social, to esteem, to self-actualization.

Yet Maslow’s theory has its share of criticisms, the most significant of which are the limited scope of his research sample and the subjective methodology used in formulating the characteristics of “self-actualization.” The study was conducted by analyzing the biographies and writings of eighteen people, most of whom were highly educated white males. The subjects included Albert Einstein, Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln, William James, Aldous Huxley, Gandhi, and Beethoven, as well as students from the top 1% of college populations. Although the study did include extraordinary women like Eleanor Roosevelt and Mother Teresa, they comprised a small percentage of his sample. Thus, the validity of Maslow’s theory is questionable as to females, as well as individuals from lower social classes and varying ethnicities. It is also relevant to note that Maslow did not include children in his study.

The empirical and theoretical criticisms of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs contemplate the following:

Cultural relativity and universalism
The validity and ordering of the original categories of needs
The lack of defined and measured variables throughout the model

Contemporary research by Tay & Diener (2011) tested Maslow’s theory by analyzing the data of 60,865 participants from 123 countries, representing every major region of the world. The survey was conducted from 2005 to 2010. The results of the study support the view that universal human needs appear to exist regardless of cultural differences. However, the ordering of the needs within the hierarchy was incorrect (see SimplyPsychology.org article here). While this and other research refute the existence of the original need categories and question the directional hierarchy that Maslow proposed, these studies do support the existence of lower and higher level needs, along with gratification and deprivation as motivators of self-actualization.

“None of Maslow’s needs can be met without social connection.” ~ Pamela Rutledge, Ph.D., M.B.A.

In her astute Psychology Today article: ‘Social Networks, What Maslow Misses,’ Dr. Pamela Rutledge takes issue with the widespread assumption represented by the pyramid: that human connection is NOT a primary need or instinct, but occurs instead as an upward climb from food and shelter. She points out the collaborative effort required for basic hunting, gathering and protection from the elements, and illuminates how the drivers of social connection are intimately interwoven into our basic survival, even in a world shifting with technology.

Purely on the basis of definition, a persuasive argument exists that motivation and self-actualization are not one in the same. And, as you can see, a rigorous unearthing of Maslow’s pyramid uncovers a framework that is clearly about self-actualization—the process of systematically meeting human needs. In fact, one might even conclude that a better title for Maslow’s 1943 paper would have been “A Theory Of Human Self-Actualization.”

Our Wonder Years

A rational mind would consider food, water and shelter more urgent requirements than affection and nurturing. The mature individual would deem safety a priority over compassionate interaction. And pragmatic adults would agree that security in maintaining these basic necessities is more important than self-esteem and the sense of belonging.

Yet as infants, wrapped in swaddling clothes and safely cuddled in loving arms, nursing at our mother’s breast and having all our fundamental needs met for us, the opposites all hold true. Common sense, supported by thousands of research studies on childhood development, tells us that at this stage of life, when sentience is rapidly developing both psychologically and physiologically, love and esteem needs are primary—not a third or fourth tier priority.

As infants and children, we acquire our vast repertoire of skills by studying the faces, voices and actions of others, beginning with our parents and primary caregivers.

The importance of early childhood development has been acknowledged by economists, behavioral scientists, educators, neuroscientists and biologists. Our formative years effect how we grow and develop through adolescence and into adult life. The most powerful external influence on all aspects of our development, resilience and adaptability to life’s challenges, is the quality of love we receive from our parents and primary caregivers.

Our formative attachment relationships determine our physiological functioning, cognitive perception and emotional awareness, development of language skills, and understanding of ourselves, others, and the unfolding world around us. The varying forms of separation anxiety experienced by all children, which can endure or recur throughout childhood, demonstrate both our innate understanding of the need for love, and our instinctive fear at the prospect of being separated from those who provide it to us.

The fundamental physiological need for emotional interaction with those who love and care for us is how motivation awakens in our lives. Love drives our desire to connect, learn and develop. When circumstances challenge our bonds to these relationships, we sometimes experience fearful reactions that we must learn to cope with. When these critical attachment relationships are non-existent or nominal, or if they are significantly compromised or severed during our childhood journey, traumatic developmental, emotional and psycho-social consequences can result—all of which are rooted in a deep and abiding fear of not receiving the love we need.

Connecting Or Separating?

Motivation is a quickening of inner awareness and self-possession based upon two factors: the drive to fulfill our basic need for love and all that we associate with it, and the experience of fear—the circumstances, situations and people we perceive as threats to that love, or to our own safety and survival. Cognition, curiosity, comprehension, exploration, discovery, affection, and affinity are among the developmental aspects of our formative years, and are all connecting behaviors primarily associated with love. Apprehension, worry, indecision, anger, aggression and aloofness are among the common childhood separating behaviors associated with fear.

Yet the primary emotions of love and fear are also conceptual in nature and as we learn more about how they influence our world, we manifest additional behaviors that reflect the broader spectrum of secondary emotions related to them. This brief Slideshare illustrates how love and fear function as powerful forces of motivation in our everyday lives, and reminds us that we can alter our perspective by being mindful and choosing compassion and empathy.

Our lives are filled with transition. Events both expected and unexpected impact our day to day functioning, self-esteem and sense of purpose. Growth and adaptation in a fluid and fast-paced world of technological, economic, political and personal challenges are prerequisites to our health, happiness and survival. The catalyst in how we respond to the trials and tribulations posed by these largely externalized factors, is motivation—an internalized, somatic phenomenon that is greatly influenced by our developmental associations with love and fear—and which, throughout life, continues to be shaped and impelled by our social interactions.

“Motivation kinetically embodies the desires, ambitions, revelations and trepidations that both consciously and subconsciously order our lives.”

Understanding the intrinsic relationship of love and fear helps us identify the underlying motivational factors in ourselves and others. We recognize separating behaviors that result from falsely perceived threats, and distinguish them from comportment rooted in deeper-seated fears. We also embrace the unifying force of love. By mindfully connecting with caring gestures, acts of kindness and compassion, and critical attending, we discover that fearful reactions can be mitigated and diffused. This is how practicing cognitive empathy negates the limiting aspects of fear and inspires us to address larger connective issues and fulfill needs that ultimately define actualized people—individually, collectively and organizationally.

Cathexis Therapeutic Imagery specializes in innovative approaches to workplace wellness, mindfulness training, and personal development. Via private coaching, presentations, workshops, training events, and our partnership in the unique online wellness community Your Wellness Room—used by Kaiser Permanente, EFactor and other notable companies—our nationally recognized programs and practices help people and organizations make positive changes. Please call for a free consultation at (818) 512-4371 or contact us via email.

The Temple Of Sleep: Communion With Our Mystical Otherworld Of Consciousness

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We spend a third of our lives sleeping. Our identities dissolve into a realm that exists beyond time, electronic stimulation and the demands of the waking world. Phantom presences swirl about as we drift through dreams. Where do these subconscious journeys lead us? And what are the benefits of a devotional relationship with sleep?

Sleep is a medium to which we are all bound, a profound and often mysterious relationship of mind, body and spirit—an ethereal connection with the conscious energy of the universe. Sleep is a sacred vessel we share in common, a circadian journey into uncharted territories of subliminal awareness and self-discovery.

Throughout history man has pondered the enigma of sleep. Many indigenous cultures hold that while sleeping, the soul transcends the body. It is believed that unencumbered by flesh and bone, the soul, or spirit, wanders to distant places or alternate realities and communes with divine powers—with angels and emissaries—giving rise to certain dreams and visions. This is akin to what is known as astral projection, a phenomenon acknowledged by science (see the article Understanding The Out-Of-Body Experience From A Neuroscientific Perspective here).

The hypotheses on sleep rendered by the scientific community over the years are numerous, yet in a profound departure from the purely physiological theories commonly preferred by physicians, Swiss neurologist and child psychologist, Edouard Claperède, observed that:

” . . . sleep has its significance not as a passive state, but as an active instinct, like all the other instincts of animal life.”

Claperède’s observation formed a valuable and influential contribution to science’s evolving theories on sleep, casting new perspectives beyond mere chemical and mechanical considerations. Many of the obscure and unexplained occurrences of sleeping, those existing more in the realms of psychology and the innate functioning of the subconscious mind, were contemplated in light of this viewpoint.

Our Dream Symbols

Dreams have served as a portal to other realms for shaman, holy men, prophets, and medicine men from indigenous cultures throughout time, reminding us of the importance of this mystical otherworld of consciousness.

Symbols occur in dreams when events take place in our lives that we are subconsciously aware of but are not yet willing to acknowledge; consequently, the awareness manifests symbolically in the dream state. Symbols also recur in dreams, or the dreams themselves recur, sometimes in slightly varying episodes. Recurring dreams and dream symbols that invoke a similar emotional response can be rooted in a past anguish or forgotten trauma, or represent an attempt to compensate for some perceived defect in character or attitude.

Yet expressions of repressed emotions, memories, traumas, challenges of character, or events we are not ready to consciously acknowledge, are not the only basis for symbolic dreams. Indeed, certain elements of dreams commonly occur which are not necessarily particular to, nor derived from, the personality or individual experience of the dreamer. Sigmund Freud first observed such elements and called them “archaic remnants.” Carl Jung referred to them as “primordial images” or “archetypes,” and described them as:

” . . . mental forms whose presence cannot be explained by anything in the individual’s own life and which seem to be aboriginal, innate, and inherited shapes of the human mind.”

Jung connected archetypes across cultural boundaries and conceptualized them as fundamental, instinctual forces that somehow exist beyond our comprehension. He believed these archetypes represent mythical characters residing within the collective unconscious of people worldwide.

The Doorstep Of The Temple

There is a difference between valuing and respecting sleep.

Science tells us that sleep plays a critical role in immune function, metabolism, memory, learning, and many other vital functions. Considering its restorative properties, psychological benefits, and overall value to our health and well-being, sleeping well is of paramount importance. Swagger, bravado, and false pride about not needing to sleep, which often go hand in hand with unhealthy lifestyles and the glorification of being busy, suggest an underlying lack of self-regard. And as for productivity, research studies show that we are far more creative and productive when we are well rested.

Sleeping well means dreaming well. We naturally hallucinate in dreams, where our thoughts, feelings, experiences, expectations, memories, and attachments are mixed together. This is a subconscious releasing and balancing necessary for emotional growth. Dreaming is imminently important in its psychological benefits. Many challenges of wisdom—assimilating, integrating and moving ahead with new insight and maturity—are related to dreams and their symbols. Dreaming is our primal and instinctive way of releasing the old and accepting the new. Not surprisingly, many who find themselves stuck in unhealthy patterns and familiar disappointing outcomes in life, practice poor sleep habits and suffer from sleep deprivation.

People routinely seek pharmaceutical solutions for sleeping problems. Yet results from studies on prescription sleep aids demonstrate the average sleeping time increases by only a few minutes each night, and the disturbing side effects of these habit forming drugs include amnesia and episodes of somnambulism (otherwise known as ‘sleep walking’). Most sleep medications function by blocking the formation of memories, which, among other negative aspects, interrupts normal rapid eye movement dream cycles and significantly alters or negates the intuitive benefits of dreaming. Users of prescription sleep aids commonly report waking up feeling groggy and unmotivated. The use of other sedative or narcotic prescription medication, drinking alcohol, or consuming illicit drugs can exacerbate this situation.

Equilibrium

The homeostasis of the total functioning of our bodies, including the critically important role of sleep, is maintained within the subconscious mind. This includes aligning our physiological and psychological processes—the relationship of our bodily functions to our attitudes, beliefs, thoughts and words—such as those about sleep. If we say “I don’t sleep well” or “I can’t sleep at night,” we won’t. If we do not believe in the value of sleep or treat it with the proper reverence, we will not reap the rewards. If we disrespect ourselves around sleep, we will not manifest the inherent benefits of health and well-being associated therewith.

“We are such stuff as dreams are made on; and our little life is rounded with sleep.” ~William Shakespeare

The importance of dreams, in particular, cannot be underestimated. Indeed, as acknowledged by Freud and Jung, the founding fathers of modern psychology, dreams are a lucid gateway to the exploration of consciousness. Maintaining a healthy relationship with sleeping—and dreaming, involves a steadfast resolve in both actions and words. This requires being mindful about our thoughts and attitudes, our internal and external dialogue, and our behaviors related to sleep.

Here are some more helpful suggestions for sleeping well:

Exercise regularly and meditate or practice yoga to manage stress
Limit refined sugars in your diet, especially in the evening
Moderate alcohol and caffeine consumption
Turn off electronic screens for at least 30 minutes before going to bed
Read prose, poetry, whimsical tales or literary works steeped in metaphor before sleep (remember those bedtime stories?) to stimulate your subconscious mind

We spend a third of our lives sleeping. To sleep well, to rest and rejuvenate, to regenerate and heal, to learn and grow . . . requires embracing and respecting sleep in all its mystical and ineffable qualities. Revere it. Speak well about it. Avoid interfering with it. Practice devotions and rituals to cultivate a healthful communion with sleep, this hallowed and sublime connection of deeper consciousness.

Our Global Ascension Of Consciousness

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A new world community is evolving, one of diversity and connectedness with all of life. This is the manifestation of a global ascension of consciousness rooted in compassion, emotional intelligence and spiritual unity. Bridging the divisions within ourselves and letting go of limiting attitudes and beliefs anneals our divine connectivity. We perceive the ways in which learned prejudices have rendered us vulnerable to the intrigues of wealth and power. The politically driven machinations of fear and apathy become increasingly transparent, and we are drawn together in challenging our governments to better serve the interests of humanity and the environment.

These are some of the issues fueling this ascension of consciousness:

More than nine million people, the majority of them women and children, are hungry and impoverished in a world that can readily afford to feed and shelter them
Our precious planet and its wild and magnificent wonders are besieged by the ecologically unfriendly and sometimes devastating footprints of industry, despite the availability of greener and more sustainable options
The predatory pricing practices of pharmaceutical companies and their methodical discrediting of holistic practices and cures that can’t be patented and sold
The inertia of institutional economic dependence on fossil fuels which fails to entice energy companies into developing viable alternatives
The incestuous infrastructure of national governments, financial institutions, and investment exchanges

Awakening

Many now eschew the jaded visage of a corporate owned media that is no longer bound by objectivity or journalistic integrity—a media that propagates the profiteering agenda of the world’s wealth nexus by ‘selling’ carefully crafted and sponsored stories—and purveys fear by sensationalizing crime, natural disaster, and human suffering. Equally disturbing, and what has become painfully evident to everyone, is how politicians fail to represent the collective interest of their electorates due to conflicts of interest created by the dark money of special interest lobbying. These deeply embedded practices circumvent political ideologies and violate the basic social contract upon which democratic governments function, transforming them from a voice of the people into a commodity of the rich and powerful.

It has become obvious that such governance practices cannot sustain our planet or its populace. This is why our global ascension of consciousness is a source of profound hope and inspiration. Considering recent developments in civil rights based on tolerance of gender, race, and sexual preference, all of which have overcome historical cultural and institutional resistance, there is every reason to believe that political lobbying reform, equitable wealth distribution, uplifting of the impoverished, affordable and integrative medicine practices, and sustainability of our planet, are reasonable and attainable goals.

Transformation

The sea change lies within each of us to avoid entanglement in the fences that would divide us. We can accomplish this in the following ways:

By discovering how to invite and nurture this collective spiritual awakening to our connection with all of life;
By finding and giving love amidst the complex personal, ideological, and cultural conflicts that will inevitably arise along the way; and
By kindling our endearing faith in human spirit and ingenuity to preserve the wonders of creation.

An emboldened future where all of life thrives with respect and dignity manifests singularly, within the hearts of each of us. We must reach out to those who resist and hold to the old paradigm— accept and embrace them as teachers instead of reacting to them as adversaries—and reverently understand it is they who will forge our greatest intention.

Compassion, emotional intelligence and spiritual unity do not spare hardship or ensure accomplishment of goals and aspirations; rather, they diffuse intimidation and polarization, thus allowing the rectitude of vision necessary for enlightenment. Ascension of consciousness begins not with answers but with questions—questions each of us must resolve within ourselves: Do we cling to apathy and the little-death of fear? Or do we surrender to the nobility and courage of love?

Shawn Quinlivan, C.Ht.

Note: I was moved to write and post this article because so many of my clients, in one way or another, have shared their deep concerns about these and other issues plaguing our world. Most have also expressed the desire to find or deepen their spiritual connection. My motivational messages, therapeutic approach, and mindfulness training model resonate with the themes of compassion and love as the way to ‘be the change’ we wish to effect in our lives. I believe casting aside fear and consciously seeking the path of empathy leads to spiritual enlightenment. By enlisting love as our vessel and compassion as our compass, we successfully navigate the stormy seas of our individual and collective realities, discovering sanctuary for ourselves and others along the way.

Light Of Winter

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A WINTER SOLSTICE MEDITATION

(Note: The following article is from a presentation on MIndfulness Meditation given during the Winter Solstice service at Emerson Unitarian Universalist Church in Canoga Park, California, on December 20, 2015.)

In this article and accompanying meditation (see the link below), we celebrate Winter Solstice in a very special way, as we join in mind, body & spirit to invite reborn light into the fertile depths of our individual and collective souls. We shall contemplate and explore the seeded darkness of our inner being; the transcendent mystery of midwinter and its promise of renewal wrought by the pale sun and cold earth; the ancient, echoed wisdom woven by countless seasons into bone and sinew and sense. We shall partake in the interconnected sentience of our living, breathing and enigmatically conscious universe. At this revered confluence of endings and beginnings, this holiest of all seasons beneath the turning of the Celestial Wheel, let us rejoice in ambient communion with the resplendent wonder of the sun’s rebirth in our hearts, and create a cradle of spirituality from which to draw inspiration.

Mindfulness

My practice includes teaching both private and corporate clients mindfulness meditation. There have been thousands of studies conducted by hundreds of independent researchers demonstrating the benefits of mindfulness meditation in reducing stress, managing emotional reactivity, improving focus and concentration, strengthening immune system function, and treating an array of medical and mental health related conditions. It is being widely used in business to facilitate healthy and productive environments and positive workplace culture. There are still skeptics, however, many of whom assign a degree “woo-woo” to the practice of meditation. Having meditated daily for nearly 40 years, I can tell you first hand that whatever woo-woo that occurs is not in the meditation itself, but rather in the experience of higher conscious. We shall consider this phenomenon in relationship to Winter Solstice a bit further, both conceptually and experientially.

I invite you to take a deep breath. Match your inhale to your exhale. Now repeat this deep, measured breathing and focus your attention on it. Notice the air moving. Touch your thumbs and fingertips together; wiggle your toes. Observe yourself in relation to the space around you. Just be present with yourself . . . in this moment. Let go of all resistance, expectation and judgment. Simply allow yourself to experience the here and now.

“Still yourself. Listen. Breathe.”

This is what is known as a mindfulness moment. The Zen of mindfulness, the bone and sinew of it, the essence of being truly present, is momentarily absolving oneself of intentional thought. And the most effective way to learn the art of mindfulness is through mindfulness meditation, which is a western, non-sectarian, research-based form of meditation derived from the ancient Buddhist practice known as Insight Meditation.

Mindfulness meditation develops the skill of paying attention to our internal and external experiences with acceptance, patience, and compassion. The idea of enlightenment, of shifting and expanding perception beyond the realm of human intelligence, is grounded in this subtle and remarkable discipline of inviting a pure awareness that diffuses the habituation of fearful thoughts, emotions and behaviors. In mindfulness meditation, one of the oldest and most venerated practices for exploring the ineffable dimensions of consciousness, the seeded darkness of our inner being, has come of age.

Unity Consciousness

But let’s set aside ancient wisdom for a moment. Instead, let’s use modern science to embrace this old world perspective of the interconnected sentience of our living, breathing and enigmatically conscious universe. I quote Neil deGrasse Tyson, popular astrophysicist and director of the Hayden Planetarium at the Rose Center for Earth and Space:

“The atoms of our bodies are traceable to stars that manufactured them in their cores and exploded these enriched ingredients across our galaxy, billions of years ago. For this reason, we are biologically connected to every other living thing in the world. We are chemically connected to all molecules on Earth. And we are atomically connected to all atoms in the universe.”

According to quantum physics theory, beneath molecules, atoms, subatomic particles, and quarks lies a singular unified field of energy, an intelligence from which all forces and particles emerge, a ‘conscious’ structural matrix that exists everywhere in the universe. This energy field is considered ‘conscious’ or ‘intelligent’ because it encompasses the basic behavior of all things within the functioning laws of nature. The scientific community calls this concept unified field theory, or unity consciousness. In his book, A Brief History of Time, Stephan Hawking refers to the phenomenon of unity consciousness as “the mind of God.”

This consciousness, or organic sentience, is foundationally influenced by the interconnection of the Sun and Earth, a transmission of galactic energy communicated through light and vibrational wave frequencies along the infinite electromagnetic spectrum (radio, microwave, infrared, visual, ultraviolet, x-ray, and gamma rays); much of which we cannot see or feel.

In his book, ‘The Social Conquest of Earth,’ pre-eminent Harvard biologist and two-time Pulitzer Prize winner E.O. Wilson sets forth a stunningly vivid and succinct description of the limited aperture through which human biology allows us to perceive our world.

The migration patterns of birds are a primary example of the ability of animals to sense electromagnetic fields

What is most fascinating and relevant about this account is not that technology can reveal realities to which we are insensate—colors we don’t see, sounds we don’t hear, energy fields we don’t sense—what is most compelling is that all of these are perceivable to biology, just not human biology. It is established biological fact that animals see colors we can’t see; hear sounds we can’t hear; feel vibrations we can’t feel; and sense electromagnetic fields.

All living things are comprised of energy that radiates an aura, a “bio-electromagnetic field,” which results from electrical impulses generated by the movement of electrons around the nucleus of our cells. The human aura includes physical, emotional, and mental/spiritual aspects, and represents this chemical, biological, and atomical connection to the living universe. Research utilizing infrared and Kirlian photography has demonstrated that meditation intensifies or “charges” this aura, which enhances its interactivity with the geomagnetic energy fields of the earth and the cosmos.

From this scientific perspective then, is it such a leap to conceive of creation’s wonder, the transcendent mystery, perhaps even divinity itself, as this conscious matrix of unified energy that surrounds and connects all living things? And is this conception not distinctly akin to what Unitarian Universalism calls “the Interconnected Web of Life?”

Winter Solstice

Winter solstice is the time to honor the transcendent mystery—the wonder of the seeded darkness and the beauty of light reborn. Celebrations of longer days to come and the turning of nature’s seasonal wheel have been common throughout cultures and history. Winter solstice is the promise of patient wisdom beneath the turning stars, a time to embrace the rebirth of the sun with great hope and compassion in our hearts.

Pagan author T. Thorn Coyle wrote that the solstice is:

” . . . a chance to still ourselves inside, to behold the glory of the cosmos, and to take a breath with the Sacred.”

For many people, the Winter Solstice season marks the only occasion all year they set foot in a house of worship. Indeed, midwinter’s confluence of endings and beginnings—the night of greatest darkness and the sun reborn in hope—stirs a searching of the soul’s belonging. It is a time of coming together in fellowship, of setting aside enmities and ideologies, of observing rites and rituals that allow us to glimpse the spiritual cradle of life’s miracle. It is a time of gratitude and wonder, of compassion and grace, of peace and goodwill.

I invite you to join me for a few minutes of Mindfulness Meditation, as we contemplate . . .

Light Of Winter

Light Of Winter Meditation

(click on the link, close your eyes, and enjoy the meditation)

Shawn Quinlivan, C.Ht.

Creative Genius: The Masks Of Pain & Sorrow

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Three years have passed since Robin Williams was found unconscious and pronounced dead at his home as a result of committing suicide. As we remember this phenomenal comedian and actor, may we keep in mind that many people live with—and are sometimes overcome by—challenges that are beyond our understanding.

The Tears Of A Clown

Often the masks that compensate for pain are brilliant and profound—insight, inspiration, and wondrous expression forged from the compress of despair and outrage at the human condition—a means of balance and equalization. This can manifest as art at its finest, yet it can be a precarious and fragile existence, an uncharted journey through the shifting moods of vulnerability, loss, isolation and melancholy. The psyche attempts to protect itself from behind the constructs of the mask, yet the vision of reality is a gestalt of the world’s wounds; and alas, even a legacy of creative genius cannot hide the hurt. Perhaps some reach a certain reckoning with that truth, while others must decide for themselves when the time has come to move along.

“Now there’s some sad things known to man
But ain’t too much sadder than
The tears of a clown
When there’s no one around.”
~Smokey Robinson

As we savor the uncanny and magnificent enchantment and laughter and unparalleled wit left by one of the greatest jesters the world has ever known, may we always keep in mind the battles others fight in their lives just to face each day, to bring themselves into our presence and share their special gifts. Let us welcome the painted faces of joy and laughter . . . and sorrow, the many masks and guises each of us wears, and may we pay special attention to those stained with tears.

Mindfulness Meditation: The Science Of Sacred Time

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In teaching my clients mindfulness meditation, I emphasize the transformative nature of the present moment, which I reverently refer to as sacred time. So much of the stress and anxiety we experience in life is directly related to our preoccupation with rehashing the past or rehearsing for the future. The ability to pay attention to our immediate experience, to truly be present in the here and now, invites a pure awareness that diffuses the habituation of negative thoughts, emotions and behaviors that are obstacles to happiness and fulfillment.

Meditation is about raising consciousness, which can only be achieved in the present, as we notice and experience—beyond preconception or judgment—the intelligent energies of the living universe that exist beyond human thought. A personal sanctity occurs in this space, an empowerment of insight and meaning, a transcendence rooted in the physiology of focused breathing and the mind-body connection, that invites us into the spiritual ‘center’ of our individual worlds.

Dancing Circles Around The Sun

Like the practice of meditation, the concept of sacred time is ancient. The cycles of day and night, the turning of the seasons, the celestial system of astrology and ancient astronomy, are evidence of time being originally perceived as circular, and serve as a basis for the enduring representations from every culture of the circle and wheel as universal symbols of life.

In Celtic wisdom, time is contemplated in two distinct aspects:

Historical time as being linear and consisting of the past, present and future
Sacred time as being circular and existing solely in the present moment

Science reveals that the physical forces of the universe which function to create our perception of time are all cyclical. The prevailing viewpoint of time, however, is that of a linear phenomenon where the future is fundamentally different from the past, a perspective that has biblical foundations and corresponds to the evolution of written language and the recording of history. But science confesses to having trouble with time because Einstein’s theories of relativity rendered over a century ago disproved the idea of time as a universal constant. Consequently, the common belief that time is a temporal occurrence is not absolute in the learned minds of those who study the physical world. (See Discover Magazine article ‘Time May Not Exist’ here).

The earth spins at about 1000 miles per hour creating a gravitational pull that curves or ‘warps’ space-time. And with the moon in its orbital tow, the earth rotates in concert with eight other planets around the celestial fireball in the center of our solar system. No “past” or “future” exists in this circular equation of cosmic force; only the here and now. Akin to the mathematical conundrum of measuring the circumference of a circle, for which no formula is precisely accurate, there is also no true measure of time. Perhaps the most palatable theory comes from quantum physics and its contemplation of a constant increase in entropy—the continual expansion of the universe—which may be the origin of why we perceive time as always marching forward. (See Wired Magazine article ‘The Flow of Time’ here).

The Absolute Now

Timelines are man-made, visual constructs; they serve as a means of looking at what has gone before so that an ordering of the world might be conceived. Yet circles, like the divinity of creation itself, are infinite and therefore defy determinite resolution. Sacred time contemplates eternity as the absolute now. Practices such as mindfulness meditation expand consciousness in the present moment and enhance our ambient communion with a living, breathing, intelligent universe. Thus, when we embrace this subtle yet remarkable discipline and become present in the sacred time of our own lives, we are in-step with the entropic sentience of the cosmos . . . dancing circles around the sun.

Shawn Quinlivan, C.Ht.

Fireworks & Flashbacks: The Triggers Of PTSD

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Hypnotherapy resolves PTSD symptoms such as panic attacks & flasbacks

The Delayed Impact Of Trauma

In the aftermath of suffering a physical or psychological trauma, it is common for individuals to mentally and emotionally dissociate from the event or situation; this occurs as a natural defense mechanism of the human psyche. However, this dissociative state often becomes the catalyst for developing symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder, which is a serious condition that can afflict a person in a variety of ways. Hypnotherapy is an effective means of helping people resolve the delayed impact of these stressful events from their past.

PTSD can occur after traumatic events such as:

Sexual Or Physical Assault
The Sudden Loss Of A Loved One
Military Combat
Witnessing Violence Or Experiencing A Catastrophe
Physically Or Psychologically Abusive Relationships

Post traumatic stress typically starts within a few months of a trauma, but can sometimes arise years later, especially when stemming from childhood incidents, and can be fueled by stressful situations or anxiety. Symptoms of PTSD include intrusive recall such as flashbacks or upsetting dreams of the traumatic event, avoidance of talking about the event, avoiding activities that were once enjoyable, hopelessness, overwhelming guilt or shame, memory and concentration problems, difficulty maintaining intimate relationships, insomnia, irritability and misplaced anger, self-destructive habits, being easily startled or frightened, seeing or hearing things that aren’t there.

“I managed to think my way through it, for the most part. I put it all up on a shelf in my mind. But then things would happen to make me remember, you know, like backyard fireworks on the 4th of July, and it would all come rushing back.” ˜MJ.S., Air Force Veteran

Triggers To Traumatic Memories

Triggers to the intrusive recall of traumatic memories are often sensory in nature. Sights, sounds, smells, tactile sensations related to the distressing event or time in life, as well as encountering certain people or situations, may cause a flood of recollections with negative thoughts and fearful feelings. There are often elements of stress and anxiety present on these occasions, which are variables that render the intrusive recall of traumatic memories, or flashbacks, unpredictable. And expectations of situations perceived to be potentially problematic or threatening sometimes create ‘anticipatory anxiety,’ which can also act as a trigger. Intrusive recall of traumatic memories is typically accompanied by physiological changes in the body such as rapid heart-beat, shallow breathing, sweating, and panic reactions, and can result in anguished emotional responses, delusional thoughts, and irrational behavior.

Intrusive recall events can be very disconcerting, especially for someone who does not realize they suffer from post traumatic stress, or for those unfamiliar with their own triggers. Unfortunately, PTSD is not always accurately diagnosed by the medical and psychological communities. Anyone who was abused physically, emotionally, sexually, or psychologically during their formative years, which includes bullying in its various forms, or who grew up in a household where there was domestic violence and/or verbal battering, may experience intrusive recall of traumatic memories or manifest other symptoms of PTSD.

Hypnotherapy And PTSD

Hypnotherapy is an effective, widely recognized, and scientifically supported treatment alternative for those suffering from post traumatic stress disorder. Randomized, controlled clinical trials have shown that hypnosis significantly decreases PTSD symptoms and is more efficient than comparison treatments (see study from Effective Treatments For PTSD, Second Edition, By Edna Foa, Ph.D. here). There is also evidence that PTSD sufferers are highly suggestible to hypnosis (see abstract from Journal of Clinical Psychiatry here).

Hypnosis directly accesses the subconscious mind, where all of our experiences, good and bad, exist as picture stories that are recalled by both thought and sensory stimulation. Hypnotherapy utilizes the interactive techniques of therapeutic imagery, along with desensitization methods such as EMDR, to gently reframe unhealthy responses—both psychological and physiological—to memories of traumatic events, diffusing their emotional charge and negative impact. Here are some of the ways hypnotherapy is effective in treating PTSD:

Empowerment through immediate coping strategies;
Identifying and neutralizing common PTSD triggers;
Alleviating intrusive recall events;
Mitigation of symptoms such as moodiness, irritability, and insomnia; and
Increased ability to focus and concentrate.

While the efficacy of any therapeutic modality depends in part on the severity of the trauma and the commitment of a given participant, hypnotherapy has successfully transformed many PTSD victims into survivors.

Mastering Mindfulness: A New Horizon In Coaching

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Mastering Mindfulness is an innovative and transformative coaching modality that cultivates emotional intelligence. The skills of presence, empathy, critical attending and reframing, and positive affirmation accelerate success by enhancing the inherent bounty of human connection.

Perhaps you have noticed how more people, especially those who have achieved a degree of the particular success they desire, have used a coach somewhere along the way. For many, a coaching relationship serves as the catalyst for achieving the growth and self-actualization they desire. A skilled coach can help you acquire greater objectivity and learn to view yourself and others in a more liberating light, free of judgment or criticism. In essence, you work on realizing how to expand not just your own self-image, but your vision of life’s infinite possibilities—to let go of limitations imposed by old attitudes and beliefs you may hold about yourself and the world, and to embrace a more profound sense of your unique value and worth within the broader context of human potential.

“Everybody needs a coach . . . every famous athlete, every famous performer, has somebody who’s a coach . . . someone who can help them see themselves as others see them.” ~ Eric Schmidt, Former Google CEO

Because coaching is an unregulated industry, many choose credentialed professionals as coaches. Athletes, sports teams, performers and professional speakers, among others, routinely employ clinical hypnotherapists to serve in this capacity. Trance state techniques such as hypnotherapy, therapeutic imagery and mindfulness meditation have proven track records as powerful mediums for motivation, focus, concentration, and for consistently producing reliable and measurable results.

Mastering Mindfulness®

Mastering Mindfulness® is a transformative coaching modality used in the meditation and mindfulness training for corporate leadership and workplace culture designed and facilitated by Cathexis Therapeutic Imagery. A combination of hypnotherapy, mindfulness meditation and therapeutic imagery—each applied to the individual landscape of your life—facilitates a keener focus and conviction for attracting a purposeful existence, one that vibrates with a deep and directed intention about the particular type of success you desire.

The disciplines, practices and interactive techniques of Mastering Mindfulness® teach you to pay deliberate attention to the current moment, without attachment to outcomes predicated upon past experiences or expectations for the future, so that you become more present in your own life. Negative thoughts, emotions and behaviors that serve as obstacles to achieving your goals are diffused, and you acclimate to a new mindset of positive insights and empowering realizations that reaffirm your motivation, commitment and resilience. You acquire new linguistic skills and tools that support a mindful framework for your personal and relational success, including:

The Cognitive Empathy Equation
Critical Attending & Reframing
The Art Of Positive Affirmation

By developing a better understanding of your own actions and feelings—and the motivational influences that undergird them—as well as an awareness of how those actions and feelings affect both you and the people around you, the connective and transcendent force of emotional intelligence begins to resonate in your life. And as you master the practice of mindfulness, your emotional intelligence develops into an enlightened and inspired consciousness. Your ability to perceive the behaviors, motivations and emotional states of yourself and others, and to positively negotiate conflicted interactions by acting rather than reacting, blossoms into a remarkable symmetry of poise, focus and self-possession.

Four Ways Mastering Mindfulness® Can Help You

1. Happiness & Fulfillment: It is not uncommon to feel at times that life has lost some excitement and hope; perhaps your routines and daily demands have left you in an emotional rut, or important relationships are presenting difficult challenges, or you have recently lost a loved one. Indeed, these are a few of the myriad reasons one might come to believe the luster and verve for living—the awe and enthusiasm and wonder—have somehow become elusive and fleeting. Just the act of finding a coach can shift this perspective and renew the conviction to seek a deeper meaning and purpose to your most trying experiences. A structured, one-on-one coaching relationship serves as a catalyst to understanding how the conscious energy of positive thoughts and self-dialogue, the honing of your emotional intelligence, forges the motivation and inspiration to overcome hardships and restore your faith and confidence in the ability to synergize the world around you in new and imaginative ways.

2. Love Relationships: Are you looking to solve problems you are experiencing with your significant other? Are you trying to attract a special partner or soul mate? Are you attempting to discover why you seem to draw a specific ‘type’ of person? Or are you perhaps trying to figure out why your romantic relationships follow certain patterns? A coach can lend invaluable insight into how self-perception, moods, disposition, and expectations affect your love life, both in the kind of people you attract and in the affection and gratification you manifest. Intimacy is a measure of self-awareness, and fostering the trust of another person in such a way that both continue to grow is the key in successful love relationships. An experienced coach can be critical in achieving the objectivity necessary for this kind of success and fulfillment.

3. Career Success: How might you actualize a career goal, such as changing professions or starting your own business, despite circumstances and practical demands that stand in your way? Maybe you are wondering if it is possible to find greater satisfaction and attract more success in your current profession? Or perhaps you just haven’t figured out the best way to combine your talents, desires, and resources into a rewarding occupational pursuit. These are some common questions you might ask when searching for direction or considering making changes in your vocational life. And quite often, it is at these critical junctures that limiting attitudes, beliefs, and self-defeating behaviors arise, perhaps preventing you from envisioning and enacting the steps necessary to realize your true potential. A coaching relationship is about challenging doubts and fears by bringing them out into the light, where they can no longer cast shadows on your ability to see and attract the infinite pathways of possibility. Mastering Mindfulness® instills the thought processes, habit behaviors, and motivation to sustain focus and direct consciousness toward fulfillment of your goal.

4. Body Image/Healthy Lifestyle: Many who struggle with weight problems have difficulty with diet and exercise; indeed, poor dietary choices and eating habits often seem to fulfill unhealthy needs, and exercise represents acknowledging this fact. Mastering Mindfulness® places emphasis on personal integrity and healthy body image, which includes acquiring a better understanding of how practicing mindfulness changes our biology in positive ways, and acceptance that regardless of individual circumstances, the equations for fitness and healthy living are similar for everyone. The accountability and encouragement involved in a coaching relationship, along with shifts in perspective brought about by trance state disciplines such as hypnosis and meditation, quickly result in a new ease of lifestyle choices that are restorative and affirming. The idea of ‘dieting’ gives way to a welcome regimen of daily nutrition and physical activity that is invigorating and stimulating, imparting renewed energy and drive for living life to its fullest.

“The secret of achievement is to hold a picture of a successful outcome in the mind.” ~Henry David Thoreau

What Is Your Takeaway?

Many people experience a nagging feeling of not living up to their true potential, a sense of failing to answer a deeper and more meaningful calling in their lives, even though on the surface things may appear to be fine. Mastering Mindfulness® is a coaching modality aimed at overcoming reactive and self-sabotaging behaviors that are rooted in fear, and at developing and trusting your inner voice—the part of you which intuitively understands the connective and enriching qualities of compassion and empathy. You learn to be present in the present by separating unhealthy emotional attachments and by utilizing the executive function required to plan and accomplish the success you desire. Hypnotherapy, mindfulness meditation, and therapeutic imagery are proven and effective motivational tools that promote emotional intelligence, inviting you to discover your own creative ways of manifesting a more significant and gratifying life.

Innovative Programs & Practices For Holistic Health

The Primal Elements

Excavating Maslow’s Pyramid

Our Wonder Years

Connecting Or Separating?

Our Dream Symbols

The Doorstep Of The Temple

Equilibrium

Awakening

Transformation

A WINTER SOLSTICE MEDITATION

Mindfulness

“Still yourself. Listen. Breathe.”

Unity Consciousness

Winter Solstice

Light Of Winter

The Tears Of A Clown

Dancing Circles Around The Sun

The Absolute Now

The Delayed Impact Of Trauma

Triggers To Traumatic Memories

Hypnotherapy And PTSD

Mastering Mindfulness®

Four Ways Mastering Mindfulness® Can Help You

What Is Your Takeaway?